PNUT GALLERY

If your New Year’s resolution is to read more (don’t worry most people have given up on theirs) we found this little guide to help you get through 100 books this year. Tweet at us what you are currently reading.

IN A NUTSHELL: MUST READ

Europe Gradually Having A Panic Attack Over Refugees
Another day, another pan-continental crisis in Europe over the influx of refugees from the Middle East. Denmark approved a controversial bill which confiscates refugees’ possessions to pay for their shelter and care (one Minister said they wouldn’t take anything “sentimental”…very kind indeed). Slovakia called European refugee policy “suicidal” and a senior EU official said that six in ten refugees were economic migrants who were not actually fleeing persecution.

How exactly is Europe dealing with this crisis?

• Lengthy asylum application system – implemented.
• Suspension of the Dublin protocol by Germany (i.e. welcoming refugees with open arms) – implemented and quasi-revoked. 
• Building walls in Hungary, Slovenia and Macedonia – implemented/under-construction.
• Border controls within the free-travel Schengen zone – haphazard implementation.
• Offering Turkey money and easier visas in return for their help on stemming the refugee flow – implemented and ineffectual. 
• Shaking down refugees for their valuables in Denmark – voted into law. 
• Pushing Greece out of the Schengen zone and building camps for 300,000 asylum seekers on Greek islands – proposed. 

INTERESTING READ: Germany: Where Leadership Is On Trial
Saudis Venmo Malaysian PM $700 Million To ‘Help’ His Election
A Malaysian court cleared Malaysian PM Najib Razak of corruption despite the fact that $681 million was deposited into his account by Saudi Arabia in 2013 (what Venmo comment would you leave?). The Saudis had been increasingly concerned about the Malaysian opposition which had been inspired by the Muslim Brotherhood, an organization which the Saudis consider as “terrorists.” Although the funds were used for the Malaysian PM’s election campaign, $61 million is unaccounted for….sounds legit.

NUTS AND BOLTS: SHOULD READ

Iranian President Completes Victory Lap Of EuropePresident Hassan Rouhani started Iran’s “comeback” tour of Europe yesterday by signing billions of dollars of deals with Italy (although Italians were outraged after they had to cover up their nude statues for him). Iran has gone on a bit of a spending binge since sanctions were lifted, including purchasing 114 Airbus planes. Rouhani also met the Pope and is scheduled to head to Paris where he’ll receive a frostier reception after refusing French wine (un grand non non).

Obama Declares War Against Prison SystemPresident Obama yesterday banned the practice of putting juveniles or low-level inmates in solitary confinement in federal prisons. He said that solitary confinement (shoving someone in a box for 23 hours a day) can lead to “lasting psychological consequences.” He announced this as part of a broader overhaul of the criminal justice system (the US locks up a greater proportion of its population than any other country – between 1987 and 2007 the prison population tripled). 

PRESIDENTIAL READ: We Must Rethink Solitary Confinement
 

GOOD READ: Trump’s Growing Sense Of Inevitability

Keeping Our Eye On…
 

• Oregon: One person was killed while the police arrested Ammon Bundy, the leader of the Oregon militia that has occupied federal land for the past few weeks. This is a developing story.  
• Bite Out Of The Apple?: Apple confirmed what you’ve been reading on your iPhone. Sales of the mobile device have grown at the slowest pace since the product’s 2007 launch. The company expects revenues to be down next quarter vs. last year. 
• The Final Countdown: The ominous sounding “Doomsday Clock” remained at three minutes to midnight (midnight = apocalypse) after the group behind the clock, the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists, cited climate change, nuclear weapons and terrorism as things we should be worried about. 
• India: Thousands gathered in New Delhi yesterday to celebrate Republic day. The annual display of military might involved camels, dogs, motorbike stunt riders….and Francois Hollande.

LOOSE NUTS: FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT

Looking To Buy An Apartment? Find The Nearest Bar Science has finally proven what we’ve been saying all along. Researchers have concluded that living near a local bar makes people “significantly” happier. Aside from the danger of becoming an alcoholic, living near a bar does wonders for your social life and actually prevents excessive drinking. The report by the Campaign for Real Ale (conflict of interest much?), also uncovered the groundbreaking new theory that social skills improve after one drink. 

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