A Violent Weekend And An Interesting Week Coming Up At The UN

PNUT GALLERY

When the Department of Justice announced that private prisons won’t be a thing anymore, we rejoiced. But did you read the fine print? Here’s the real impact of the DoJ’s decision.

 IN A NUTSHELL: MUST READ

A Most Violent Weekend: East Coast Edition

The United States was hit with multiple acts of violence this weekend, creating varying levels of panic and confusion along the Eastern seaboard. Investigations are underway to look at the following bombings and shootings:

• New York: A bomb was set off in the Chelsea neighborhood of Manhattan on Saturday night, leaving 29 people injured. During the police search after the blast, a possible secondary device was discovered a few blocks away. The potential bomb – a pressure cooker with a cell phone and wiring taped to it – is currently being examined by the city’s bomb squad.
• New Jersey: Earlier that day, an explosion went off in Seaside Park, New Jersey, most likely timed to disrupt the Marine Corps charity run. Three pipe-bomb devices were found wired together in a garbage can near the boardwalk, but the the devices were rudimentary and only one of them detonated. There were no reported injuries.
• Pennsylvania: Investigators are still looking for a motive and more information on the lone gunman who went on a shooting spree in West Philadelphia. Police say that Nicholas Glenn shot two police officers and four civilians, leaving one young woman with injuries that would later kill her. Officers eventually killed Glenn during his his four-block shooting spree, and found a note with him that was addressed to “doomed people.”

Introducing Daily Pnut’s UNGA Drinking Game

It’s that special time again. A time when the world’s leading policy makers, activists, investors, journalists, experts and of course celebrities descend upon New York City to tackle the biggest issues facing humanity. While these talking heads decide our fate, let’s kick back and play Daily Pnut’s UNGA Drinking Game. The rules are simple:

• Take a shot every time you hear a new term for ISIS, ISIL, Daesh, Islamic State, you know the one.
• When US President Obama lightens the mood with a joke, drink.
• When an accused dictator denounces American imperialism, drink.
• When Obama and Canadian PM Justin Trudeau share an inside joke, swoon but also drink.
• When a world leader insists that they’re doing “all they can” for refugees, drink.
• Whenever special advisor Karen AbuZayd calls those world leaders out on their BS, drink.
• Take a shot whenever Ban Ki-moon says it’s “high time now” for a woman to lead the organization.
• If Fiji’s UN Ambassador Peter Thomson says “It’s great to finally be here,” drink.
• If someone suggests a way of fighting Zika without wiping out our bees, drink.
• And if the Paris Agreement gets ratified, open a bottle of champagne.

Have more ideas to add to the list? Tweet at us your suggestions using the hashtag #UNGAGames and we’ll share our favorites throughout the week.

NUTS AND BOLTS: SHOULD READ

Syrian Soldiers Killed In Not-So-Friendly Exchange Of Friendly Fire

A weeklong ceasefire in parts of Syria came under serious strain over the weekend when it emerged that US airstrikes had mistakenly bombed Syrian troops, killing at least 62 of them. The troops – which the Syrian government claims were fighting ISIS – were mistakenly identified as ISIS by the US troops who were also trying to bomb ISIS. The US and Syrian governments aren’t really on the same side of the conflict however, with the US backing anti-government rebels in other parts of the country. Despite their “frenemy” status, the US did express “regret” for killing Syrian soldiers but said no one warned them they would be there. Russia, a strong ally of the Syrian government, called an emergency UN meeting, accusing the US of putting the whole ceasefire at risk. Already, it appears that the ceasefire is falling apart as air strikes have begun to hit rebel-controlled areas of Aleppo. That’s definitely going to make the UN General Assembly this week pretty salty…

Russian Democracy Unlikely To Loosen Putin’s Grip On Power

Russia voted in their parliamentary elections on Sunday and things felt like business as usual for Putin’s team. In an exit poll by state-run polling organization VTsIOM, President Vladimir Putin’s United Russia Party led with 44.5% of the vote, with the nationalist LDPR coming in second place with only 15.3%. The Communist Party collected a paltry 14.9% of the vote and probably could have done better in the US elections at this point.

The lack of surprises in this election could be due to the notably low turnout in big cities. In Moscow, only 28% of voters cast their ballots, compared to over 50% in the previous election five years ago. Back in 2011, there were protests and accusations of voter fraud, but it looks like the opposition is burnt out. The low voter turnout suggests all of Putin’s opponents simply sat this one out.

Egypt Lawyers Up Against Human Rights

Egyptian courts froze the assets of five of the country’s most prominent human rights defenders, accusing them of receiving “foreign funding to destabilize the country.” The ruling is part of an ongoing campaign against critics of the regime. As a quick refresher: the regime initiated a crackdown against Muslim Brotherhood supporters when it swept them from power in a popularly backed coup in 2013. Since then, the crackdown has widened to include human rights activists like Hossam Bahgat and pro-democracy activists like Alaa Abdel Fattah, both of which were also critical of the Brotherhood’s regime.

Meanwhile, French investigators looking into the downing of an EgyptAir flight over the Mediterranean believe they have found traces of TNT, indicating that a bomb was used. The exact cause of the drowning hasn’t been determined yet and no one has claimed responsibility, which might indicate that it was an accident since terrorists love taking credit for terror.

KEEPING OUR EYE ON 

Germany: Berlin held their state elections and the exit polls did not look good for Chancellor Merkel’s CDU party. Even worse, the right-wing anti-migrant party Alternative for Germany (AfD) is projected to enter the state parliament for the first time.

Thailand: At least 13 people are dead and 10 more are missing after a boat sank on Thailand’s Chao Phraya River on Sunday. The boat was carrying over 100 people, most of whom were Muslim pilgrims, when it hit a bridge.

Kashmir: India is accusing Pakistan of Sunday’s deadly raid on a Kashmir army base. The attack killed 17 soldiers, but that number is expected to rise as over 35 people are injured, some critically. India did not wait to accuse their neighbors to the north and label Pakistan “a terrorist state.”

 LOOSE NUTS: FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT

Help Save Nelly By Streaming His Music Hundreds Of Millions Of Times

As you may have heard, Nelly is in trouble. The rapper reportedly owes more than $2.4 million in taxes, and fans across the country (as well as in Daily Pnut headquarters) are playing his songs on repeat in an effort to earn him a little extra cash. Spin did the math on what it would take for Nelly to earn that kind of money just from Spotify, and the numbers are a little grim. At the bare minimum, you’ll have to stream a Nelly song 402,880,500 times to make a decent dent on his tax issues, but no worries! We’ll never get sick of “Hot in Herre.”