Hurricanes, Chemical Weapons, and Landmines, oh my!

We live in an extremely politically divided time in America and globally. After reflecting on Daily Pnut’s writing, style, & strategy over the past few weeks (and with some reader feedback) we’ve decided that we are going to differentiate ourselves by being centrist, pithy, educating, and entertaining. Not boring. We are “just the facts with some sugar & spice.” Who would have thought that being in the middle (cue Jimmy Eat World) would be unique?

Three Menacing Hurricanes Bearing Down: At 11:30 pm ET Hurricane Irma with 175 mph sustained winds was heading straight for Miami, leaving behind a trail of unprecedented destruction across the Caribbean and 13 deaths. Florida Governor Rick Scott ordered mandatory evacuations for the eastern part of Dade County. The Category 5 storm is the largest ever recorded in the Atlantic Ocean.

Not far behind are two other storms. Hurricane Katia, in the southern Gulf of Mexico, threatens to hit the vulnerable Mexican coast as a Category 2 or 3 hurricane late Friday or early Saturday. Hurricane Jose reached major hurricane status Thursday evening in the Atlantic Ocean. It appears to be threatening some of the same Caribbean Islands flattened by Irma. According to a Colorado State University meteorologist this is the first time in seven years that three hurricanes have spun in the Atlantic Basin at the same time.

Israel Enforces Red Lines and Attacks a Syrian Chemical Weapons Facility: Early Thursday Israeli military jets struck a Syrian chemical weapons manufacturer. The attack killed two soldiers and caused damage near the town of Masyaf. The airstrikes also hit a military camp next to the center that was used to store ground-to-ground rockets. Iranian personnel and those of its ally, the Lebanese Hezbollah group, had been seen there on multiple occasions. The  former head of Israeli military intelligence, said the strike sent the message that Israel would not let Syria produce strategic weapons, would enforce its own red lines, and would not be hampered by Russian air defense systems in Syria. Human Race: 1, Bad Guys: 0.

Are You the Son of Donald Trump?: Yesterday the Senate Committee questioned Don Jr. for more than five hours about his June 2016 meeting in Trump Tower with a Russian lawyer. In the hearing Don Jr. admitted he had been anxious to receive the “dirt” the emails promised on Hillary Clinton, but only because as an upstanding citizen who cared about Mrs. Clinton’s fitness. Don Jr. said he never told President Trump about the meeting. The Special Counsel is now investigating which White House staff witnessed or helped draft the initial statement that Don Jr. met because he wanted to learn about Russian adoptions. Rumor has it the Special Counsel team have been blaring the Beastie Boys while cruising around DC and signing: “I can’t stand it, I know you planned it. But I’m gonna set it straight, this Watergate.”

China’s Got 99 Problems and a Billionaire is one: Guo Wengui, also known as Miles Kwok, is a Chinese billionaire that has been residing in the US since 2014. He’s made it a hobby to accuse high ranking Chinese officials of corruption via social media with little evidence and makes no bones about his desire to disrupt next month’s important Communist Party congress, an event that only happens once every five years. Well, it’s caught up with him as Interpol has issued a “red notice” for his arrest at China’s request and he fears he’s now a “political opponent of the Chinese regime.” He has filed for political asylum in the US, triggering protections that allow him to stay after his tourist visa expires this year. Guo, yo, brush your shoulder off.

Burma’s Rohingya Muslim Minority to Everyone: Hello Darkness, My Old Friend: Ethnic Rohingya Muslims are among the most persecuted people in the world. They claim Bangladeshi ancestry but reside in northern Myanmar (Burma).Over 164,000 have fled to Bangladesh recently amid military crackdowns and violence. Myanmar’s leader (and Nobel Prize Winner), Aung San Suu Kyi claims “terrorists” are to blame for the violence, but it’s undisputed that the ruling party has a strong distaste for the Rohingya minority. To make matters worse, Russian-madeantipersonnel land mines have been placed along the exodus routes of the refugees(likely by Myanmar military). (Ig)Nobel prize winner or coincidence? We are skeptical that farmers suddenly enjoy planting Russian land mines.

The Pontiff Offers Counsel in Colombia: Pope Francis, South America’s first Pontiff, had a busy day in Colombia. He asked the country to put aside their differences during a Mass attended by over a million people. We hope the better angels of our nature prevail, to recap: Colombia has recently emerged from a 50-year civil war. Part of the peace agreement (brokered by now-unpopular President Juan Santos) is that former FARC guerrillas (murderers and kidnappers) will avoid jail and may enjoy seats in congress as a legitimate political party. If South Africa can heal and move forward after apartheid, surely there’s hope for post-war Colombia.

• The US Army inadvertently created offensive leaflets. The Taliban calmly respond with a suicide bomber. Seems like an utterly reasonable and proportional response someone says after inhaling some of Afghanistan’s finest opiates.
• The US Army isn’t making good flyers, and it also isn’t ready to fight Russia. As it is”underequipped, undermanned and inadequately organized to confront military aggression from Russia.” MAGA!
• Close to half of America’s identity information has been stolen from Equifax. NBD, just another day on the internet. There has to be better cyber regulation said the last remaining rationale American alive. Also remind me again why I should have all of my personal  information given to credit agencies? Oh yeah, so the hackers can get it.
• The Navy had a Bad Santa, well worse than that, a sexual predator. He’s been re-assigned only after USA Today began investigating whether he would reprise his role in this year’s Pentagon Christmas celebrations.
• Relax AI will not take your job, but it will have better gaydar: an algorithm deduced the sexuality of people on a dating site with up to 91% accuracy, raising tricky ethical questions.”
• We have landed on the moon. We have greatly improved race relations. We have many times over scaled Mount Everest. And we have helped Tinder make boatloads of money while turning “relationships into a transactional game played by the atomised and lonely.”
• President Trump embraced the left but he swiped right politically on Chuck and Nancy. Republicans are worried that this is more than just a one night-issue stand.

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